More on Personal Growth

Alex Mathers
3 years ago Draft
12 practices of the zenith individuals I know
Calmness is a vital life skill.
It aids communication. It boosts creativity and performance.
I've studied calm people's habits for years. Commonalities:
Have learned to laugh at themselves.
Those who have something to protect can’t help but make it a very serious business, which drains the energy out of the room.
They are fixated on positive pursuits like making cool things, building a strong physique, and having fun with others rather than on depressing influences like the news and gossip.
Every day, spend at least 20 minutes moving, whether it's walking, yoga, or lifting weights.
Discover ways to take pleasure in life's challenges.
Since perspective is malleable, they change their view.
Set your own needs first.
Stressed people neglect themselves and wonder why they struggle.
Prioritize self-care.
Don't ruin your life to please others.
Make something.
Calm people create more than react.
They love creating beautiful things—paintings, children, relationships, and projects.
Hold your breath, please.
If you're stressed or angry, you may be surprised how much time you spend holding your breath and tightening your belly.
Release, breathe, and relax to find calm.
Stopped rushing.
Rushing is disadvantageous.
Calm people handle life better.
Are attuned to their personal dietary needs.
They avoid junk food and eat foods that keep them healthy, happy, and calm.
Don’t take anything personally.
Stressed people control everything.
Self-conscious.
Calm people put others and their work first.
Keep their surroundings neat.
Maintaining an uplifting and clutter-free environment daily calms the mind.
Minimise negative people.
Calm people are ruthless with their boundaries and avoid negative and drama-prone people.

Maria Urkedal York
3 years ago
When at work, don't give up; instead, think like a designer.
How to reframe irritation and go forward
“… before you can figure out where you are going, you need to know where you are, and once you know and accept where you are, you can design your way to where you want to be.” — Bill Burnett and Dave Evans
“You’ve been here before. But there are some new ingredients this time. What can tell yourself that will make you understand that now isn’t just like last year? That there’s something new in this August.”
My coach paused. I sighed, inhaled deeply, and considered her question.
What could I say? I simply needed a plan from her so everything would fall into place and I could be the happy, successful person I want to be.
Time passed. My mind was exhausted from running all morning, all summer, or the last five years, searching for what to do next and how to get there.
Calmer, I remembered that my coach's inquiry had benefited me throughout the summer. The month before our call, I read Designing Your Work Life — How to Thrive and Change and Find Happiness at Work from Standford University’s Bill Burnett and Dave Evans.
A passage in their book felt like a lifeline: “We have something important to say to you: Wherever you are in your work life, whatever job you are doing, it’s good enough. For now. Not forever. For now.”
As I remembered this book on the coaching call, I wondered if I could embrace where I am in August and say my job life is good enough for now. Only temporarily.
I've done that since. I'm getting unstuck.
Here's how you can take the first step in any area where you feel stuck.
How to acquire the perspective of "Good enough for now" for yourself
We’ve all heard the advice to just make the best of a bad situation. That´s not bad advice, but if you only make the best of a bad situation, you are still in a bad situation. It doesn’t get to the root of the problem or offer an opportunity to change the situation. You’re more cheerfully navigating lousiness, which is an improvement, but not much of one and rather hard to sustain over time.” — Bill Burnett and Dave Evans
Reframing Burnett at Evans says good enough for now is the key to being happier at work. Because, as they write, a designer always has options.
Choosing to believe things are good enough for now is liberating. It helps us feel less victimized and less judged. Accepting our situation helps us become unstuck.
Let's break down the process, which designers call constructing your way ahead, into steps you can take today.
Writing helps get started. First, write down your challenge and why it's essential to you. If pen and paper help, try this strategy:
Make the decision to accept the circumstance as it is. Designers always begin by acknowledging the truth of the situation. You now refrain from passing judgment. Instead, you simply describe the situation as accurately as you can. This frees us from negative thought patterns that prevent us from seeing the big picture and instead keep us in a tunnel of negativity.
Look for a reframing right now. Begin with good enough for the moment. Take note of how your body feels as a result. Tell yourself repeatedly that whatever is occurring is sufficient for the time being. Not always, but just now. If you want to, you can even put it in writing and repeatedly breathe it in, almost like a mantra.
You can select a reframe that is more relevant to your situation once you've decided that you're good enough for now and have allowed yourself to believe it. Try to find another perspective that is possible, for instance, if you feel unappreciated at work and your perspective of I need to use and be recognized for all my new skills in my job is making you sad and making you want to resign. For instance, I can learn from others at work and occasionally put my new abilities to use.
After that, leave your mind and act in accordance with your new perspective. Utilize the designer's bias for action to test something out and create a prototype that you can learn from. Your beginning point for creating experiences that will support the new viewpoint derived from the aforementioned point is the new perspective itself. By doing this, you recognize a circumstance at work where you can provide value to yourself or your workplace and then take appropriate action. Send two or three coworkers from whom you wish to learn anything an email, for instance, asking them to get together for coffee or a talk.
Choose tiny, doable actions. You prioritize them at work.
Let's assume you're feeling disconnected at work, so you make a list of folks you may visit each morning or invite to lunch. If you're feeling unmotivated and tired, take a daily walk and treat yourself to a decent coffee.
This may be plenty for now. If you want to take this procedure further, use Burnett and Evans' internet tools and frameworks.
Developing the daily practice of reframing
“We’re not discontented kids in the backseat of the family minivan, but how many of us live our lives, especially our work lives, as if we are?” — Bill Burnett and Dave Evans
I choose the good enough for me perspective every day, often. No quick fix. Am a failing? Maybe a little bit, but I like to think of it more as building muscle.
This way, every time I tell myself it's ok, I hear you. For now, that muscle gets stronger.
Hopefully, reframing will become so natural for us that it will become a habit, and not a technique anymore.
If you feel like you’re stuck in your career or at work, the reframe of Good enough, for now, might be valuable, so just go ahead and try it out right now.
And while you’re playing with this, why not think of other areas of your life too, like your relationships, where you live — even your writing, and see if you can feel a shift?

Rajesh Gupta
3 years ago
Why Is It So Difficult to Give Up Smoking?
I started smoking in 2002 at IIT BHU. Most of us thought it was enjoyable at first. I didn't realize the cost later.
In 2005, during my final semester, I lost my father. Suddenly, I felt more accountable for my mother and myself.
I quit before starting my first job in Bangalore. I didn't see any smoking friends in my hometown for 2 months before moving to Bangalore.
For the next 5-6 years, I had no regimen and smoked only when drinking.
Due to personal concerns, I started smoking again after my 2011 marriage. Now smoking was a constant guilty pleasure.
I smoked 3-4 cigarettes a day, but never in front of my family or on weekends. I used to excuse this with pride! First office ritual: smoking. Even with guilt, I couldn't stop this time because of personal concerns.
After 8-9 years, in mid 2019, a personal development program solved all my problems. I felt complete in myself. After this, I just needed one cigarette each day.
The hardest thing was leaving this final cigarette behind, even though I didn't want it.
James Clear's Atomic Habits was published last year. I'd only read 2-3 non-tech books before reading this one in August 2021. I knew everything but couldn't use it.
In April 2022, I realized the compounding effect of a bad habit thanks to my subconscious mind. 1 cigarette per day (excluding weekends) equals 240 = 24 packs per year, which is a lot. No matter how much I did, it felt negative.
Then I applied the 2nd principle of this book, identifying the trigger. I tried to identify all the major triggers of smoking. I found social drinking is one of them & If I am able to control it during that time, I can easily control it in other situations as well. Going further whenever I drank, I was pre-determined to ignore the craving at any cost. Believe me, it was very hard initially but gradually this craving started fading away even with drinks.
I've been smoke-free for 3 months. Now I know a bad habit's effects. After realizing the power of habits, I'm developing other good habits which I ignored all my life.
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Maddie Wang
3 years ago
Easiest and fastest way to test your startup idea!
Here's the fastest way to validate company concepts.
I squandered a year after dropping out of Stanford designing a product nobody wanted.
But today, I’m at 100k!
Differences:
I was designing a consumer product when I dropped out.
I coded MVP, got 1k users, and got YC interview.
Nice, huh?
WRONG!
Still coding and getting users 12 months later
WOULD PEOPLE PAY FOR IT? was the riskiest assumption I hadn't tested.
When asked why I didn't verify payment, I said,
Not-ready products. Now, nobody cares. The website needs work. Include this. Increase usage…
I feared people would say no.
After 1 year of pushing it off, my team told me they were really worried about the Business Model. Then I asked my audience if they'd buy my product.
So?
No, overwhelmingly.
I felt like I wasted a year building a product no one would buy.
Founders Cafe was the opposite.
Before building anything, I requested payment.
40 founders were interviewed.
Then we emailed Stanford, YC, and other top founders, asking them to join our community.
BOOM! 10/12 paid!
Without building anything, in 1 day I validated my startup's riskiest assumption. NOT 1 year.
Asking people to pay is one of the scariest things.
I understand.
I asked Stanford queer women to pay before joining my gay sorority.
I was afraid I'd turn them off or no one would pay.
Gay women, like those founders, were in such excruciating pain that they were willing to pay me upfront to help.
You can ask for payment (before you build) to see if people have the burning pain. Then they'll pay!
Examples from Founders Cafe members:
😮 Using a fake landing page, a college dropout tested a product. Paying! He built it and made $3m!
😮 YC solo founder faked a Powerpoint demo. 5 Enterprise paid LOIs. $1.5m raised, built, and in YC!
😮 A Harvard founder can convert Figma to React. 1 day, 10 customers. Built a tool to automate Figma -> React after manually fulfilling requests. 1m+
Bad example:
😭 Stanford Dropout Spends 1 Year Building Product Without Payment Validation
Some people build for a year and then get paying customers.
What I'm sharing is my experience and what Founders Cafe members have told me about validating startup ideas.
Don't waste a year like I did.
After my first startup failed, I planned to re-enroll at Stanford/work at Facebook.
After people paid, I quit for good.
I've hit $100k!
Hope this inspires you to request upfront payment! It'll change your life

CyberPunkMetalHead
3 years ago
I made ChatGPT copy itself.
OpenAI's ChatGPT is an amazing AI-powered chatbot. It can write poetry, stories, and marketing campaigns, and it's also adept at coding. ChatGPT's coding is so amazing that it replicated itself. What happened:
Me: Hi
Hello! Can I help? I'll answer any inquiries you have.
Me: Build a python and flask AI chatbot that responds to user messages on the frontend.
CGPT:
from flask import Flask, request, jsonify
import openai
openai.api_key = "YOUR_API_KEY"
@app.route('/chatbot', methods=['POST'])
def chatbot():
user_message = request.get_json()['message']
response = chatbot_response(user_message)
return jsonify({'response': response})
def chatbot_response(user_message):
response = openai.Completion.create(
engine="text-davinci-002",
prompt=user_message,
max_tokens=1024,
n = 1,
temperature=0.5
)
return response['choices'][0]['text']
if __name__ == '__main__':
app.run()To integrate a chatbot with a frontend, use Flask to serve an HTML page with a form for user messages and the chatbot's answer. AJAX can submit the form to the /chatbot route, and JavaScript can show the chatbot's response.
I imported code snippets at the top of the file.
Let's add a frontend interface, I said.
CGPT:
<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<title>AI Chatbot</title>
</head>
<body>
<h1>AI Chatbot</h1>
<form id="chatbot-form">
<label for="message">Message:</label><br>
<input type="text" id="message" name="message"><br>
<input type="submit" value="Submit">
</form>
<div id="chatbot-response"></div>
<script src="https://ajax.googleapis.com/ajax/libs/jquery/3.5.1/jquery.min.js"></script>
<script>
$(document).ready(function() {
$("#chatbot-form").submit(function(e) {
e.preventDefault();
var userMessage = $("#message").val();
$.ajax({
type: "POST",
url: "/chatbot",
data: JSON.stringify({message: userMessage}),
contentType: "application/json; charset=utf-8",
dataType: "json",
success: function(response) {
$("#chatbot-response").text(response.response);
}
});
});
});
</script>
</body>
</html>To serve this HTML page using Flask, build a new route that returns the page as a GET response.
So far, so good.
Looked quite basic so I got chatGPT to add some tailwind to the project.
Me: Tailwind the chatbot.html page, please. Give it a futuristic style with purple and neon
After a few more prompts, Talk GPT aligned the form to the center, changed some colors, and added padding.
CGPT:
<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<title>AI Chatbot</title>
<link href="https://unpkg.com/tailwindcss@^1.0/dist/tailwind.min.css" rel="stylesheet">
</head>
<body class="bg-black flex flex-col justify-center items-center">
<h1 class="sm:text-center text-purple-500">AI Chatbot</h1>
<form id="chatbot-form" class="border-purple-500 bg-purple-800 rounded">
<label for="message">Message:</label><br>
<input type="text" id="message" name="message" class="min-w-30 rounded"><br>
<input type="submit" value="Submit" class="bg-purple-500 border-red-500 transform hover:scale-110 rounded">
</form>
<div class="flex justify-center">
<div id="chatbot-response" class="text-white rounded"></div>
</div>
<script src="https://ajax.googleapis.com/ajax/libs/jquery/3.5.1/jquery.min.js"></script>
<script>
var colors = ['red', 'orange', 'yellow', 'green', 'blue', 'indigo', 'violet'];
var colorIndex = 0;
$(document).ready(function() {
setInterval(function() {
$("#chatbot-form").css('border-color', colors[colorIndex]);
colorIndex = (colorIndex + 1) % colors.length;
}, 1000);
$("#chatbot-form").submit(function(e) {
e.preventDefault();
var userMessage = $("#message").val();
$.ajax({
type: "POST",
url: "/chatbot",
data: JSON.stringify({message: userMessage}),
contentType: "application/json; charset=utf-8",
dataType: "json",
success: function(response) {
$("#chatbot-response").text(response.response);
}
});
});
});
</script>
</body>
</html>Improved:
A few more prompts like “Add more vertical and horizontal padding to the submit button and vertical margin, and vertically align this file's body.”
The result:
Is it effective? Now, I'll chat with ChatGPT's AI Chatbot. I intervened minimally throughout construction. Chat GPT created numerous files, connected and interacted with its own API, and presented the user request response on the front end by itself.
Me to AI Chatbot: Hey, can you give me 6 name suggestions for a black horse?
Me to AI Chatbot: Write a poem in the style of Jim Morrison. Make sure to mention cacti and black holes
ChatGPTs Chatbot:
In the desert night, I am confronted by cacti,
Their arms reaching out, As if to grab me and take me away.
The stars in the sky, Beckon me to come,
To a world of black holes, Where I can be free.
I am in a trance, My body and mind,
In a state of limbo, As I wander the night.
I hear a voice, Calling me to the unknown,
I cannot resist, The lure of the black hole.
The cacti watch, As I take my leave,
To a place of mystery, Where I can find peace.
Of course, the next question I gave it was to build a chatbot!
Me: Build a python and flask AI chatbot that responds to user messages on the frontend.
ChatbotGPTs:
import os from flask
import Flask, request, jsonify
from chatterbot
import ChatBot
from chatterbot.trainers
import ListTrainer
# Create a new chatbot
bot = ChatBot(
"My Bot",
storage_adapter="chatterbot.storage.SQLStorageAdapter",
logic_adapters=[
"chatterbot.logic.BestMatch",
{ "import_path": "chatterbot.logic.BestMatch",
"statement_comparison_function": "chatterbot.comparisons.levenshtein_distance",
"response_selection_method": "chatterbot.response_selection.get_first_response" }
],
database_uri="sqlite:///database.sqlite3" )
# Train the chatbot with a few sample conversations
conversation = [ "Hello", "Hi there!", "How are you doing?", "I'm doing great.", "That is good to hear", "Thank you.", "You're welcome." ]
trainer = ListTrainer(bot) trainer.train(conversation)
# Create a Flask app
app = Flask(__name__)
# Define a route for the default URL
@app.route("/") def index(): return "<h1>Chatbot</h1>"
# Define a route for the /get_response URL
@app.route("/get_response", methods=["POST"])
def get_response():
# Get the user's message
user_message = request.form["user_message"]
# Get the bot's response
bot_response = bot.get_response(user_message)
# Return the bot's response
return str(bot_response)
# Run the Flask
app if __name__ == "__main__": app.run()No matter how many times I tried, the second generation always used chatterbot instead of the ChatGPT API. Even when I told it to use the ChatGPT API, it didn't.
ChatGTP's ability to reproduce or construct other machine learning algorithms is interesting and possibly terrifying. Nothing prevents ChatGPT from replicating itself ad infinitum throughout the Internet other than a lack of desire. This may be the first time a machine repeats itself, so I've preserved the project as a reference. Adding a requirements.txt file and python env for easier deployment is the only change to the code.
I hope you enjoyed this.

Deon Ashleigh
3 years ago
You can dominate your daily productivity with these 9 little-known Google Calendar tips.
Calendars are great unpaid employees.
After using Notion to organize my next three months' goals, my days were a mess.
I grew very chaotic afterward. I was overwhelmed, unsure of what to do, and wasting time attempting to plan the day after it had started.
Imagine if our skeletons were on the outside. Doesn’t work.
The goals were too big; I needed to break them into smaller chunks. But how?
Enters Google Calendar
RescueTime’s recommendations took me seven hours to make a daily planner. This epic narrative begins with a sheet of paper and concludes with a daily calendar that helps me focus and achieve more goals. Ain’t nobody got time for “what’s next?” all day.
Onward!
Return to the Paleolithic Era
Plan in writing.
Not on the list, but it helped me plan my day. Physical writing boosts creativity and recall.
Find My Heart
i.e. prioritize
RescueTime suggested I prioritize before planning. Personal and business goals were proposed.
My top priorities are to exercise, eat healthily, spend time in nature, and avoid stress.
Priorities include writing and publishing Medium articles, conducting more freelance editing and Medium outreach, and writing/editing sci-fi books.
These eight things will help me feel accomplished every day.
Make a baby calendar.
Create daily calendar templates.
Make family, pleasure, etc. calendars.
Google Calendar instructions:
Other calendars
Press the “+” button
Create a new calendar
Create recurring events for each day
My calendar, without the template:
Empty, so I can fill it with vital tasks.
With the template:
My daily skeleton corresponds with my priorities. I've been overwhelmed for years because I lack daily, weekly, monthly, and yearly structure.
Google Calendars helps me reach my goals and focus my energy.
Get your colored pencils ready
Time-block color-coding.
Color labeling lets me quickly see what's happening. Maybe you are too.
Google Calendar instructions:
Determine which colors correspond to each time block.
When establishing new events, select a color.
Save
My calendar is color-coded as follows:
Yellow — passive income or other future-related activities
Red — important activities, like my monthly breast exam
Flamingo — shallow work, like emails, Twitter, etc.
Blue — all my favorite activities, like walking, watching comedy, napping, and sleeping. Oh, and eating.
Green — money-related events required for this adulting thing
Purple — writing-related stuff
Associating a time block with a color helps me stay focused. Less distractions mean faster work.
Open My Email
aka receive a daily email from Google Calendar.
Google Calendar sends a daily email feed of your calendars. I sent myself the template calendar in this email.
Google Calendar instructions:
Access settings
Select the calendar that you want to send (left side)
Go down the page to see more alerts
Under the daily agenda area, click Email.
Get in Touch With Your Red Bull Wings — Naturally
aka audit your energy levels.
My daily planner has arrows. These indicate how much energy each activity requires or how much I have.
Rightward arrow denotes medium energy.
I do my Medium and professional editing in the morning because it's energy-intensive.
Niharikaa Sodhi recommends morning Medium editing.
I’m a morning person. As long as I go to bed at a reasonable time, 5 a.m. is super wild GO-TIME. It’s like the world was just born, and I marvel at its wonderfulness.
Freelance editing lets me do what I want. An afternoon snooze will help me finish on time.
Ditch Schedule View
aka focus on the weekly view.
RescueTime advocated utilizing the weekly view of Google Calendar, so I switched.
When you launch the phone app or desktop calendar, a red line shows where you are in the day.
I'll follow the red line's instructions. My digital supervisor is easy to follow.
In the image above, it's almost 3 p.m., therefore the red line implies it's time to snooze.
I won't forget this block ;).
Reduce the Lighting
aka dim previous days.
This is another Google Calendar feature I didn't know about. Once the allotted time passes, the time block dims. This keeps me present.
Google Calendar instructions:
Access settings
remaining general
To view choices, click.
Check Diminish the glare of the past.
Bonus
Two additional RescueTimes hacks:
Maintain a space between tasks
I left 15 minutes between each time block to transition smoothly. This relates to my goal of less stress. If I set strict start and end times, I'll be stressed.
With a buffer, I can breathe, stroll around, and start the following time block fresh.
Find a time is related to the buffer.
This option allows you conclude small meetings five minutes early and longer ones ten. Before the next meeting, relax or go wild.
Decide on a backup day.
This productivity technique is amazing.
Spend this excess day catching up on work. It helps reduce tension and clutter.
That's all I can say about Google Calendar's functionality.
